MINDERS 107

Tia: Now boys, you’ve got your morning coffee, lunch is on the timer in the oven. Forest: You’re leaving us? What’s going on? What’s for lunch? Tia: We have to go out for a little shopping – we get the Minders uniforms but what goes underneath we buy our own. And it’s cottage pie, and there’s stewed plums and ice cream in the fridge. Smokey: I could come with you and help with the fitting. Fei: Will you ever give up Smokey? Barbra: Ah, sorry boys, this fuckin’ bra’s getting on my tits – and not in the right way! Heavy 1: OK boss. You get sorted and then tell us why you called us in Heavy 2: (thinks) Creep! Barbra: I’ve been watchin’ the show – it’s gettin’ tired. We need some new girls. Heavy 1: Don’t you get them from an agency? Barbra: That’s where I got the current lot of talentless fuckin’ bimbos! I want new talent and you’re going to get it for me. Heavy 2: You want us to lean on the agency Boss? Barbra: Fuck no! There’s two cute little Minders moved into the Porn Tower. I want them in here! Heavy 1: You want us to kidnap them Boss? Barbra: Let’s say ‘persuade’. I’ve hacked one of the CCTV’s and I’ll tell you when they’ve gone out without those two old doddering farts they’re supposed to look after. Heavy 1: No problem! Just give us the word.